On Thursday, Tesla showed us its take on the pickup truck. Instead of the tried and tested approach of a frame construction like every other full-size pickup truck out there (not to mention the Tesla Models S and X), Musk’s team has gone for a monocoque chassis design. Its body is made from naked stainless steel, the same grade alloy that SpaceX uses for its now-destroyed prototype rocket. The reveal was disjointed and unpracticed; supposedly unbreakable glass broke when it was hit in a demonstration of how unbreakable the Cybertruck is. But we expect no less from one of Musk’s reveals.
The Cybertruck definitely has an out-there look, but then I had been forewarned by a friend with advanced knowledge to expect ” something like a stealth fighter. ” And I’ll be honest, I rather like it, although I think it would be more at home outside a built-up, human inhabited environment. I could certainly imagine these driving around Mars, but that might just be down to having seen some ofThe Expanseseason 4 recently. But like I say, I was forewarned. My coworkers didn’t stay up late to watch actors dressed for the Thunderdome pose on stage next to a concept car; instead, they all got to wake up to the news. It would be an understatement to say that there were some strong opinions, and so we’ve decided to air them here, in the hope that everyone gets it out of their system.
The reaction was overwhelmingly negative. “That thing looks like they couldn’t afford an actual CAD software package,” said Science Editor John Timmer. Science writer Chris Lee was no kinder: “Side view: uh, okay… Views at an angle: my word, exceeds expectations, troll-level 11 unlocked, “he told me.
“I think my initial reaction last night was ‘Oh no … That’s more Mad Max than Blade Runner,'” said science writer Scott Johnson.
DuhLorean, or D’ohLorean?
“It’s like a DeLorean that made love to the tank from the ‘ (s arcade game) Battlezone, “said Managing Editor Eric Bangeman. The cocaine-smuggling, fast-talking entrepreneur who built a stainless steel car was a common theme. “CyberTruck? More like CyberWTF. That is truly a billionaire’s idea of what a pickup truck is. It is even less pickup truck than some of Detroit’s and Japan’s abominations are. It’s like a Ridgeline got pressed into a DeLorean,” IT Editor Sean Gallagher told me.
“It’s as if a DeLorean and a toaster oven had a baby,” shared Health Reporter Beth Mole.
Perhaps predictably, Gaming Editor Kyle Orland went to the world of video games to put the Cybertruck into context. “Nothing I say about the new Tesla truck is going to beat this tweet, he said, before adding that” It looks like something from a PS1 game set in a post-apocalyptic wasteland “:
when your computer is old so you have to run everything on the lowest settingspic.twitter.com/hUuSOX1bfh
– Mike Drucker (@MikeDrucker) (November) , 2019
“It was the polygonal shock heard ’round the world, this angular truck-thing. I couldn’t sleep in my vacation bed, jet-lagged and picking through another region’s Netflix selection, when my social media feed exploded with responses to the Tesla Cybertruck, “said Culture Editor Sam Machkovech. “I keep some pretty gaming-fluent company, so my favorite meme response in the first 20 minutes was the car superimposed into the ’80 s arcade classic Hard Drivin ‘. This fit the most common sentiment: the Cybertruck looks like a vision of the future through the coked-out lens of the’ 80 s. ‘Am I the only one who kinda loves it?’ one lone dissenter offered on my feed between the jokes and memes. As someone who otherwise hates trucks, I agreed. I grew up in a state where every month is Truck Month ™, so I’ll take a wild new truck-thing out of Robocop’s Detroit well before I dream of crawling into another Tacoma or F – 150. For a company like Tesla, that contrarian lust may prove good enough for Cybertruck’s fortunes. “
Some of us didn’t hate it
Not everyone was an out-and-out hater. Like me, Creative Director Aurich Lawson also saw something of the Colonial Marines in the vehicle. “It reminds me of theAliensAPC, which gives it a funny sense of unrealism. They shot a lot of the scenes for that with a remote control scale model, and while it looked great, you could tell there was something off about the mass and physics of it because of that. I get that same sense now looking at the Tesla, like my brain is telling me it’s fake, and it’s going to bounce along the road like it’s made out of plastic. That’s just my immediate take, I’m honestly not sure what I make of it on a deeper level yet. It’s going to need some time to settle, “he said.
Meanwhile, its look was unimportant to reporter Tim Lee. “My opinion on whether the Cybertruck is ugly: aesthetic standards are arbitrary. Also it doesn’t matter if your car is ugly because when you’re driving it you can’t see the outside,” he explained. Deputy Editor Nate Anderson actually reacted more to the pickup’s name. “Sure, it looks like a prototype for a lunar rover, but it’s the late ’90 s name that really gets me. Will any pickup owner non-ironically refer to this thing as a ‘Cybertruck’? As in , ‘Hey, Carol, just throw those 2x6s in the Vault of my Cybertruck’? Sigh. The Future — it neverquitelives up to its billing, “he said.
Finally, a couple of us weren’t shy about expressing some appreciation for Cybertruck. “I think it looks badass. It looks like what 6-year-old Lee thought cars would look like in 2019! On the other hand, I don’t think I’d ever actually own one, because, I mean… look at it , “Senior Editor Lee Hutchinson told me.
And editor Peter Opaskar had just two words: “Dude, sick.”